


I'm Your Satellite and You're The Sky

by Adanof



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Daddy Kink, Domestic Fluff, Japhan, M/M, Marriage Proposal, Mpreg, Parenthood, Phanfiction, Possessive Phil, crybaby Dan, pregnant Dan
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-08-16
Updated: 2016-03-07
Packaged: 2018-04-15 02:17:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 12,226
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4589277
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Adanof/pseuds/Adanof
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"We should get a fish irl. I'm sure we can look after a fish."<br/>"No."<br/>"No?"<br/>"Really? We joke about so many things. Do you really want to be responsible for a life?"<br/>"Yes."</p><p>Dan may or may not have spoken too soon.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Poppy Seed

**Author's Note:**

> Loosely canon. Follows basic timeline and also completely ignores other facts. What the hell am I even doing.

They’re flying somewhere over Russia in the middle of the night, and for once, Phil is asleep on the plane. Between the dim artificial light, the low humming of the engine, and the soft comfort of his designated travel blanket, it only took 3 episodes of Friends before 2 weeks’ worth of fun-filled Japanese exhaustion finally caught up to him.

Dan glances over to his right, smiling to himself, lowers the volume on Phil’s headphones, and very gently slides them off his head and onto his lap. The movement causes his head to slip down a bit and onto Dan’s shoulder. Phil stirs in his sleep, blindly reaching and patting before finding Dan’s hand to interlock their fingers, and with a deep contented sigh, he is once again dead to the world.

Dan stretches out his free left hand, still getting used to the feeling of heavy cool metal, the weight of their world on his fourth finger. He still can’t believe it.

.

It was actually an accident. Duncan and Mimei had disappeared to vlog somewhere, so that left the two of them just wandering around the park, hand in hand. It was so serene, so nice to not be bombarded with fans in public, to just be free and be themselves.

Dan forced Phil to take selfies together under the sakura trees until he was satisfied with the outcome, and walking side by side in the beauty of the Japanese springtime, it seemed that life was just perfect.

All the beauty of nature must have gone to Phil’s head, because he started going on this long winding schpiel about how far they’ve come and destiny and soulmates with Dan not really paying too much attention, because Phil would get teary-eyed and sentimental about this sometimes. Dan was just about to point out to Phil that there was a rogue bird terrorizing another couple’s picnic when he turned and Phil was down on one knee.

He didn’t even have the ring, which was actually hidden away in his suitcase, but he said later that the moment just felt right. Dan had stood frozen before he started shrieking, causing several Japanese elders to glare sharply at them. There was definitely ugly crying involved, as well as calling Phil “you idiot”, but of course he said yes, yes, yes!

The rest of the day passed in a beautiful euphoric blur, their minds high on the thoughts of _finally_ and _mine_ and _forever_. By the time they got back to their hotel room that night, the feeling had grown into wandering hands and biting kisses and too many clothes.

Breaking away despite a desperate whine from Dan, Phil had sat Dan on the bed before digging around in his suitcase. Having found what he was looking for, he turned back to Dan and knelt, took his right hand for a kiss, and held it to his heart as he proffered a small black velvet box.

Dan could not breathe.

He froze and stared in shocked silence as Phil smiled his special smile and cracked the box open to reveal a black ring with black stones. Very slowly, very tenderly, Phil took Dan’s left hand, looking him deep in the eyes, and slid the ring onto his slender finger. It felt like single thing in Dan’s life had been leading up to this exactly moment, his entire universe now literally in his hand and in the heart of the beautiful man at his feet.

The hand on Phil’s chest clenched and firmly pulled him up as Dan crashed his lips into Phil’s, ardor once again ignited as he pulled Phil on top of him on the bed.

Phil chuckled. “I’ll take it that you like the ring.”

“Shut up and kiss me, you spork.”

“You just agreed to marry this spork forever, so-”

Dan silenced him with another firm needy kiss, one hand buried in Phil’s hair, the other desperately pulling up at the hem of his jumper as their legs entangled together. This was about them. This was their perfect moment. No one else mattered, because here they weren’t anybody else; they were just two people in love. They had to savor this before they had to go back to London, back to being just two friends living together.

Dan blushes red, thinking if only everyone knew just how “friendly” they had been in their joined bed.

And in the shower.

And on the couch.

And against the wall.

And in the bathtub.

And over the table.

And on the floor.

And even on the bloody balcony on the last night of their trip when the sky was particularly clear and the city lights particularly magical.

Gosh, when did they become _those_ people?

 

_._

_Ding ding._

Dan glances down his right shoulder to see Phil open-mouthed and drooling a little bit on his blanket. He turns gently to take Phil’s glasses off and set them aside while Phil shifts in his sleep to slip his right arm over Dan’s waist, burying his face deeper into Dan’s shoulder before falling straightaway back asleep.

“The captain has turned off the seat belt sign. You can now move freely about the cabin.”

Dan smiles. No need to move. This is exactly where he wants to be.


	2. Apple Seed

Something has felt slightly off for a while now, but he can’t quite seem to put a finger on it. So, being the responsible adult that he is, Dan chooses to ignore it.

.

Phil’s family (which Dan realizes is officially his family now as well) came to visit a couple days after they came back from Japan. It went as it usually did, with Phil’s mother hugging them with surprising strength for a woman of her stature and puttering around the kitchen, muttering to herself about the state of their refrigerator while Phil’s dad and brother sat in the lounge clamoring for their gifts from their trip.

As they were plating the meal of Thai takeout, Dan spotted Phil about to open the container of tofu curry, usually Dan’s favorite, but this time, everything in his body screamed  _NO_.

He grabbed Phil’s wrist to stop him, and a startled Phil looked up at him.

“Is everything okay…?”

“Phil, I don’t know why or how I know this, but I swear, if you open that container, I will vomit all over you and the counter.”

Phil backed away slowly, gingerly taking his hands away, and Dan breathed a silent sigh of relief.

“Wouldn’t want that now, would we?”

Dan stuck his tongue out at him, proceeding to gather up the plates and spoons to set the table, Mrs. Lester coming in to help.

Everything was fine, until Phil heard a blood-curdling shriek and the clattering of cutlery being dropped and scattered all over the floor. His mind immediately went to a rogue mouse or a giant radioactive bug or an alien invasion, and he dashed over to the lounge to see what had happened.

If his heart had not been hammering so hard, the scene before him would have been comical. Mrs. Lester stood frozen, spoons at her feet, her eyes wide and staring at the table. Martyn and Mr. Lester sat turned on the couch with identical expressions of shock, mouths open. Dan stood, a giant deer in the headlights, a hand still extended over the table where he had just set down the plates.

At Phil’s entrance, it seemed like a spell had broken. They turn to look at him, his mother’s mouth now a thin line, an unreadable emotion on her face.

“ _Phillip Michael Lester._ ”

Oh shit. The whispered full name.

“ _Were you ever planning on telling us that you and Dan ran off to Japan to get engaged?_ ”

Dan and Phil’s eyes met with the same look. Fear? Sheepishness? Guilt?

Slowly under his mother’s iron expression, Phil edged over to stand next to Dan and gently took his hand in his own. Dan looked down at their interlocked fingers wrapped around his black band and then up to meet Phil’s blue gaze, a look that made his heart so full, that covered everything bad that he has ever felt, a look that he wanted to wake up to every single morning for the rest of his life.

_“Yes.”_

A breathy whisper was all Dan could manage.

Their expressions blossomed with the same magical, uninhibited glee, eyes lost in the other’s before turning to face their family.

“Yes! We’re engaged!”

Once again, Mrs. Lester flung her arms around them, now crying loudly and yelling at Phil for not saying so sooner while Mr. Lester and Martyn clapped Phil on his shoulder with proud expressions. Dan felt the tears and overpowering emotions welling up in his heart and buried his face into the junction of Phil’s shoulder and just let his family show them how much they were loved.

The rest of the night passed without a hitch. Mrs. Lester demanded to see Dan’s ring and to hear the complete story of the proposal. After dinner, they showed them some of the unedited videos, Phil’s parents marveling at the beauty of Japan, Martyn elbowing Phil knowingly at the sight of their messy hotel room.

It was barely nine o’clock, but snuggled up in their sofa crease with Phil’s arm over his shoulder, Dan began to feel his eyes get droopy. Maybe jet lag was still taking a toll on him, which might explain his constant exhaustion.

Noticing Dan dozing off, Phil plants a gentle kiss on his temple. Blinking sleepily, Dan wakes and smiles contentedly at his fiancé.

His  _fiancé_.

He is never going to get used to that.

Phil urges him to go to bed, promising to be there in a while. Dan slowly gets up, bids the Lesters good night, goes to his room to strip down to his boxers, and crawls into the dark warmth of his bed. 

The comforting sounds of muted conversation and dishes being put away lulls him to sleep until several hours later, when the door opens and a heavy arm drapes over his waist, long legs entangling with his own. He turns around, shifting to weakly clutch the front of Phil’s shirt and feeling his heartbeat.

Yes. For once, absolutely everything in Dan’s life is perfect.

.

It’s the first time that they’ve been home in a while, and Dan feels like absolute shit.

After getting back from New York, he dropped his suitcase by the front door, kicked off his shoes, trudged upstairs, and fallen face first into his bed. Groaning, he reached out for his Haru pillow, curled up around it, and breathed in the familiar scent.

 _Finally_.

The entire trip had been less than stellar.

Even the plane ride was terrible. For all the traveling he’s ever done, Dan has never had too bad of an experience. However, on the entire flight, he fought constant dizziness and nausea, resulting in downing 4 cans of ginger ale, nibbling on stale crackers, and maybe a silent crying session. Phil was such an angel, holding out the bag whenever Dan gagged, rubbing his back, opening his snacks, mumbling sweet soothing encouragements.  

It did not get better once they landed. Maybe it was the weather. Maybe it was the harsh New York attitude. Maybe it was something in the water. It seemed like Dan had to pee constantly, which is not the most convenient in the big city. Everything made him tired. Walking around, pushing through the crowds, getting on transportation, even socializing with his friends drained him.

He couldn’t even fully enjoy Louise’s birthday, whispering to Phil that everything seemed so loud and that his head really hurt. With concerned eyes and a quick nod, Phil found Louise to tell her that they were leaving early as Dan felt unwell. After a quick hug goodbye, he called a cab for them and held Dan’s hand silently in the dark cab.

All Dan had wanted was to go home, and now that he's here, he finally lets himself relax.

He falls into a dreamless sleep, exhaustion taking over for a few hours, until once again, his bladder wakes him up. 

At some point in the night, Phil had put a blanket over him and helped him take off his socks and his jacket. Not wanting to wake Phil who was still snoring gently beside him in the early morning light, Dan carefully sits up in bed, but as soon as he stood, a wave of nausea hits him. He hurries into the bathroom and empties his stomach in the toilet just in time.

_Ugh._

He hasn't been sick like that in such a long time.

 _"Haha, maybe I'm pregnant,_ " he lets himself joke bitterly.

He forces himself to brush his teeth, and trudges back to bed.

_What a ridiculous thought._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, thank you so much for taking time out of your life to read this, and thank you so much for all the kudos! I will continue to do my best! Please leave comments; they make me feel validated.


	3. Blueberry

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, another update?! Just a note, I'll be moving back into my university dormitory tomorrow and with the start of the new school year, updates might not come out as quickly as they have been. Thank you guys so much again for continuing to read my story!

“Dan!” Phil calls. “Get in here, we’re filming today, remember? Don’t you miss your son, Dil?”

A grumpy Dan appears from the kitchen with a giant bowl of sliced pineapple. He has just been so hungry lately, and there’s nothing else he wants to eat but cold fruit.  

“He’s your son, too. Shut up and let’s play, you nerd.”

Phil sneaks a quick peck on the corner of his mouth, licking at the sweet juice.

“You love this nerd.” 

Dan rolls his eyes affectionately as he sets his bowl down, turns on the camera, and pulls up the game. They’re in the middle of another one of their signature tangents when Phil brings it up.

"We should get a fish irl. I'm sure we can look after a fish."

"No."

"No?"

"Really? We joke about so many things. Do you really want to be responsible for a life?"

"Yes." 

All Dan can do is laugh and shake his head. Phil had brought up getting a fish a while ago, but then he immediately changed his mind to include a lion and a polar bear and a kangaroo. Dan glances at the giant dork next to him who had just managed to knock the bowl of pineapple off the table and all over his lap.

Phil looks up at Dan sheepishly.

“Okay, you’re right. We are nowhere near responsible enough to take care of a life. Can you imagine if that was Jonathon? Let’s wait on my fish dream. Also, let’s maybe edit this part out of the video?”

.

 

It’s the fourth time he is hunched over the toilet in the morning that week, and Dan is trying so hard to keep quiet about it. He knows how Phil will fret and force him to go to the doctor and be infuriatingly motherly and gentle, and Dan is sure that it’s just an extended stomach bug that will pass.

A small seed of creeping doubt whispers to him the fear that has been brewing in the back of his mind for a while now. There’s no way, right? They’ve done their best to be careful, right? Except for maybe that one time in Japan. Along with the 8 other times. And maybe also that quick one in the airport bathroom on their layover.

_Oh shit. He might be-_

Dan doesn’t let himself finish that sentence, but the next time they order from Tesco, he secretly gets 4 different tests if only to shut up the nagging voice in his head. It wouldn’t hurt to be absolutely sure.

One morning when Phil's gone to the shop to buy the eggs that they had forgotten for mid-morning pancakes, Dan locks himself in the bathroom with a small unsuspecting paper bag. He dumps the contents onto the counter, rips open all four boxes, and reminds himself to breathe.

He wees quickly on the sticks, repeating in his head _"It's going to be okay, it's going to be okay, it's going to be okay."_ He carefully lays them in a neat row face-down on the counter and sets a timer.

His hands are shaking. In, out, in, out, in, out. He resorts to sitting on the floor and picking nervously at his clothes, fixing his hair, tapping impatiently. He keeps glancing at his phone timer, but that doesn’t seem to make it go any faster. After the longest 3 minutes of his life, he slowly gets up, takes a deep breath, and flips them all over at the same time.

Frozen.

His brain, soul, breath, blood all freeze as his eyes focus on all four tiny screens that all scream the same thing. He can’t move think breathe because he is _fucked._

_Quite literally fucked._

He feels his knees weakening, the air is too thick, and something in his chest suddenly feels as though it weighs a thousand pounds.

As if in a mindless haze, he sweeps all the boxes and sticks back into the paper bag, hides the bag in a cabinet, and floats back to Phil’s bed. He crawls in slowly and gathers up the heavy comforter to wrap himself up leaving only his face exposed. His chest is too tight and the hammering of his heart only makes it harder to breathe.

He rolls over and buries his face into Phil’s pillow. Only when he smells Phil’s mix of cologne and shampoo does he let himself cry. He reaches out to grab the pillow and holds it close to his body for dear life, his throat choking as he tries to curl himself up into the smallest ball possible. 

After a while, he hears Phil bellowing for him and he hears his footsteps coming down the hallway. Dan quickly rubs the tears from his face, trying to regulate his breathing, and remains buried in his pile of blankets. Maybe if he stays still enough…

From a tiny peephole through the blanket, he can see Phil coming closer and looming over him on the bed. He feels the bed dip as Phil crawls up and sneaks his feet under the comforter to entangle his legs with Dan’s and a hand slips under to gently pull his body close.

Dan snuggles into the warmth, feeling Phil smile and press a kiss into his hair. He relaxes completely into the perfect curve of Phil’s chest at his back, feeling the gentle rise and fall, the low thrumming of his heartbeat, and the comforting smell of home. If only he could bottle up this moment and live in it forever.

The hand resting on Dan’s hip is thumbing the waistband of his sleep pants, and when Phil’s fingers brush his tummy, Dan suddenly remembers and his spine stiffens.

He rolls towards Phil, his heart hammering once again. He is met with that stupid mess of hair and 2 sparkling blue eyes inches away framed by glasses. You could count every little freckle and all his eyelashes, and Dan suddenly wants to kiss each one, his pounding heart swollen with the ocean of love he has for this man. Dimples out on display, Phil flashes a quick blinding smile before pressing another soft kiss to the corner of Dan’s mouth.

“Breakfast, love.” His voice was always especially raspy and deep in the morning. Dan lets out a soft whine at the line of kisses Phil was planting along his jaw before Phil pulls away and bounds out of the room.  

Dan allows himself one small smile before sitting up and rubbing his eyes. He takes a deep breath, throws on a t shirt, and forces himself to get up and go to the lounge.

Phil had prepared two plates of pancakes complete with chocolate smiley faces, with Dan's plate also filled with some cut strawberries. He's currently sitting on the floor of their lounge, a cup of coffee in his hand and trying to figure out what they want to watch today over the breakfast. He sits Dan on the couch and hands him his plate.

"I know you haven't been feeling very well for a while now, so let me take care of you!"

Dan can feel the tears threatening to well up again, but thankfully, Phil has already turned around and is humming an anime theme song to himself.

Dan quickly brushes his eyes and very gently, very hesitantly, lets his hand rest on the slight curve of his abdomen. Phil plops down next to him and starts chattering away about some strange woman who bumped into him at the grocery store. Dan is only half listening, staring at this man he is so in love with and trying so hard to savor the time they have together.

_He cannot mess this up._


	4. Raspberry

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HELLO MY FRIENDS I HAVE RETURNED FROM THE WAR.  
> Yeah, so the first weeks back at uni kind of kicked me in the butt. Thank you for staying with me! Hope you enjoy this chapter!

Phil isn’t stupid.

Yes, they’re careful, but sometimes, Dan forgets to take a pill or things just get so heated before Phil can get a condom.

He probably should have known the second week of their trip in Japan, after their 3rd round that morning, with a completely boneless and sated Dan snuggled into him and sleeping peacefully with an array of marks on his neck.

He probably should have known on the flight home from New York when Dan was sobbing into his chest about seemingly nothing as Phil had his arm over his shoulder and held him close to his heart.

He probably should have known that time in the middle of the night when he thought perhaps a robber had gotten into the house, but it was just Dan sitting on the floor of the kitchen flooded with the refrigerator light and eating unwashed grapes from the bag.

He probably should have known how absolutely radiant Dan looked when they were filming their last video, almost as if he was _glowing_.

But now, standing at their front door looking over the receipt of their weekly groceries with the Tesco delivery man waiting for his signature, Phil can’t help but stare stupidly.

_Four pregnancy tests? There must be a mistake. There’s no way, unless –_

The delivery man glances where Phil’s eyes are glued to the paper, and gives him a hearty clap on the shoulder with a loud chuckle.

“Good on ya, mate! Guess the missus wanted it to be a surprise then!”

Phil nodded mindlessly, still in a daze as he somehow managed to scribble out a signature before he was left alone at his doorstep.

He slowly and gingerly picked up the bags, subconsciously holding them slightly away from his body, almost as if there were something unpleasant inside. He finally manages to trudge up all those stairs and bangs his way through the front door.

Dan is there in a heartbeat, almost as if he was waiting for him.

Phil doesn’t say anything, but he holds the bags in his left hand out, knowing that the things Dan is probably waiting for are inside.

There’s something different about Dan that Phil didn’t notice before. Now, he finally recognizes the roundness in his face and a slight widening of his hips, but more than that, it is a certain look in his eyes.

Dan seems to be on overdrive, nearly snatching the bags out of Phil’s hand. Today he seems paler, his dark circles more prominent, his hands more twitchy and nervous. Is that… fear?

Dan doesn’t think Phil notices him sneak a quick peek into the bag before hurrying away to put things away.

Phil sighs deeply.

Phil probably should have known, but now all he can do is wait on Dan.

.

He still hasn’t said anything to Phil.

Dan had eaten his breakfast in silence next to an oblivious Phil who was just happily munching away at his pancakes.

After he finished, he wordlessly got up in the middle of the anime they were watching, put his plate in the sink, went into his room, and locked the door behind him, leaving Phil sat alone on the couch.

Dan crawled into his own bed, which he hadn’t done in a while, and wrapped his entire body in the comforter, leaving a hole for his face. Once again, his eyes were tearing up as he dreaded what the coming months would bring.

When Dan didn’t return after a while, a concerned Phil got up to check on him. After seeing Dan’s closed door, a rare sight nowadays, he knocked gently on the wood a few times.

“Dan…? Is everything alright?”

He was met with silence, which only worried him more.

Occasionally, Dan would get into one of his moods where he would just need to sit and be quiet all by himself, and after a while, he would emerge and be okay, but this didn’t quite seem like one of those times.

Phil knocked again for good measure, but once again, there was no response. He may or may not have heard one tiny sniffle, but it seemed like Dan did not want to talk right now.

“Hey, Dan, I know you’re in there. If you want to talk about it, I’m always here for you, okay? I promised you forever, and I mean it.”

Phil laid a palm on the wood on the door, hoping that his gentleness would get across to Dan.

“I love you so much, and all I want to do is to take care of you, if you’ll let me.”

Behind the door, in the bed, underneath the covers, Dan choked back a small sob. His chest felt so tight and it felt like there wasn’t enough air.

“Stop it, Dan. Just breathe, it’s not good for the-“

Dan stopped himself.

“It’s okay, it’s okay. Just in. Out. In. Out. That’s right.”

He heard Phil’s footsteps moving away from the room, and all Dan wanted was to open the door and run into Phil’s arms and just spill everything and maybe cry a lot, but that couldn’t happen right now.

Dan rubbed the tears away from his face and forced himself to sit up in bed. He couldn’t let himself slip into another bottomless pit of hopelessness and existentialism. Not now. Not when he had… his condition to be aware of.

Taking a deep breath, Dan placed one tentative hand on the bottom curve of his belly. It did indeed feel firmer and rounder, and with that knowledge, Dan found courage and walked bravely over to his computer. Right now, he was terrified and didn’t know anything, but he’d be damned if he didn’t educate himself on every single facet of what was going to happen in the coming months.

Hours later, after reading so many articles and watching so many videos and learning so much, Dan felt a little bit light-headed, a little bit more educated, a little bit nauseous, and maybe just a little bit less scared. He closed the window of his computer, took a deep shuddering breath, and stumbled over to his bed. He sat at the headboard propped up by all his pillows as he lays his hand on his belly again.

_"What are we going to do, little one? How are we going to tell your daddy about you?"_

Dan slowly stands up to walk towards the mirror. He flips the hem of his shirt up to see if a bump was noticeable. Maybe it was the lighting or the way his pants fit on his hips, but it already looked like something about him was wider, fuller, more taut. Rubbing himself gently, Dan took another shaking breath, pulled his shirt down, and unlocked his door.

Phil was in the office, editing the Sims video with headphones on. Dan padded quietly over to him and pressed a kiss on his temple, being careful not to startle him. Phil looked up at him with a radiant smile. No words were necessary, as long as he knew that Dan is okay now and that he is _so loved_. Phil stood to let Dan fall into his embrace.

When Phil lets his hand rest on Dan’s hip, a bit too close to his belly, Dan flinched microscopically, but Phil’s hands continued to move to hold Dan tightly by the waist. Dan’s lip wobbled a bit, finally letting himself relax in the arms of the man he loves. He threw his arms around Phil’s shoulders and snuggles his face into his neck as Phil lets him listen to his heartbeat.

By the time their pizza for lunch was delivered, Dan was smiling and talking again, and it seemed that everything was back to normal.

.

Dan may not have noticed, but Phil started watching him like a hawk.

He noticed how Dan never slept without a shirt on at night anymore.

He noticed how Dan would tear up at the RSCPA charity advert and would quickly brush his eyes and hide his face.

He noticed when Dan would stiffen when they laid in bed and Phil’s hands began to wander.

He noticed that Dan started to refuse junk food and began taking vitamins.

Of course, by now, Phil knew.

But it was Dan's choice to tell him, and he was willing to wait until Dan made his decision.

Phil now took to holding doors open for Dan, jumping up to offer to carry heavy camera equipment, secretly buying more fruits and vegetables, kissing Dan in the early morning light and whispering just how beautiful he always is and how much he is loved.

Though he isn't supposed to know yet, he's going to be the best fiance ever and take care of his Dan and make sure every single thing is okay.

.

Everything was most certainly not okay.

It is 2 days later, and Dan had almost forgotten about it.

Reading all that information had calmed him down, as all that scientific knowledge made it easier for Dan to compartmentalize and remove himself emotionally from the situation, but he was cleaning the bathroom when he found the bag again.

Seeing those four confirmations again screaming at him that everything was going to change soon and that nothing would ever be the same again made that small voice in Dan’s head start whispering again.

_This is your fault, you know. You got yourself into this. It’s your fault for forgetting to take your pills. You haven’t even told Phil yet. Phil is going to be so angry that you kept this to yourself. And he even said that you weren’t ready for responsibility. Phil doesn’t want this. How do you think you’re going to do this? Phil is going to hate you._

He slowly crumples against the bathroom wall, curls himself up into the smallest ball possible, and that’s when he begins to cry.

It’s this position that Phil finds him in 5 minutes later when he barges in to look for his phone, and he is immediately in the floor cradling a sobbing Dan in his lap who has buried his face in Phil’s chest.

After several minutes when the cries have calmed to hiccupy whimpers, Phil runs his fingers soothingly through Dan’s hair and asks Dan to go sit and wait for him on the couch.

Still sniffling, Dan nods and rubs his face with the end of his sleeve as Phil hurries off. When Phil is gone, Dan hastily shoves the tests into his pocket, straightens himself out with a deep breath, and wanders into the lounge.

He plops himself into his familiar sofa crease and draws his knees up to his chest. He forces himself to take deep long breaths and to remain calm. 

_Keep it together._

Phil returns with a hot cup of tea which he hands to Dan. Dan reaches out and takes a tentative sip while Phil plops down to Dan's right on the edge of the sofa. Dan sets the cup on the coffee table before turning to Phil.

Phil's expression is just so soft, so gentle, so full of love and concern.

Dan can feel himself welling up with emotional tears again, and he feels Phil's safe and warm arms wrap around him and Dan lets himself throw his legs over Phil's to curl up and bury his face into the crook of Phil's neck as he begins to sniffle again. 

“What’s wrong, babe?”

And Dan remembers the plastic sticks buried in his pocket and the news he’s going to have to break to Phil and he starts hyperventilating again because _oh my gosh, Phil literally just said that we’re not responsible enough, and I’m too young and stupid, and we can’t even take care of a fish, and what if he doesn't want this baby_ and a million other thoughts run through his mind until he is interrupted by a pair of lips firmly pressing against his own and he is quieted.

He lays his head on Phil’s chest again for a while, just listening to his heart beat.

_"Phil, I'm pregnant."_

The words come out on their own, whispered so softly and suddenly that Dan himself barely realized that he said them until he feels Phil's right arm tighten around his waist with his other hand still softly stroking the nape of his neck. 

_"I know, love."_

Dan freezes. Time has stopped and his heart is frozen and he can't hear anything and Dan thinks he might be sick again if Phil doesn't say something.

After a long silent moment, Phil meets Dan’s uncertain teary gaze.

Dan chokes out a breathy sob, nodding. "I'm so sorry, Phil... Please don't be mad at me..."

Phil takes Dan’s left hand in his own and forces him to look deep into his eyes

“Are you mad because of the fish thing?”

_What._

Phil presses on. "Are you upset because I said that we aren't responsible enough to take care of a fish because I was definitely joking and making a statement about my own clumsiness and I didn't even know whether or not you even really wanted a fish because I always thought that you wanted a dog first and this doesn't matter but I actually found out when the Tesco guy made me sign and he thought you were my wife and I'm so sorry that I didn't tell you earlier but I was just waiting for you to tell me because it's totally up to you and- _mmrph_ "

Dan has slapped a hand over Phil's mouth. He's staring at Phil with tears still his eyes. Once he realizes that Phil will shut up, he takes a deep breath, looks Phil in the eye, digs around in his pocket, and shows him all four pregnancy tests.

Phil’s expression changes immediately to frozen with his eyes comically wide and his mouth hanging open. His gaze bounces between the tests and Dan and finally to his stomach.

Very slowly, Phil reaches out a hand and spreads his palm to lie on Dan’s still flat tummy as Dan starts chokes out another sob. 

"You know I could never be mad at you."

Phil's voice has softening into that husky sensual rumble.

"I love you so much, Dan, and I'm so sorry that I ever made you feel like you had to carry this burden by yourself. I don't ever want you to feel lonely, because I promised you forever, and I will never leave you alone again."

At this point, Dan had hidden his face into Phil's neck again, tears freely dropping like wet diamonds onto Phil's shirt.

_"Look at me."_

Phil tenderly nudges Dan's chin up with a gentle finger as Dan hesitates to meet his eyes.

"We're a team, remember? We can do anything together, and we can definitely do this. Because we're a family together now, and I'm going to do everything I can do to protect and cherish and love you and this baby." 

Dan looks up to see Phil staring into his soul with such intensity that he almost stops breathing. 

"Also," Phil continued, his eyes darkening and his voice deepening as his hands runs up Dan's sides, "you've got my baby inside you."

Dan's eyes widen as he can feel Phil's bulge growing and hardening next to his leg.

"Everyone is going to know that I was the one who fucked you, I was the one who put that baby inside of you. Everyone is going to know that you're mine."

 _"And that's the fucking hottest thing I can imagine."_  

Dan lets out a watery giggle as Phil plants kisses along his jaw and gently tosses him onto the couch so that Phil's now leaning over him to kiss with more force, Dan's hands now buried in his hair as he lets Phil ravage his neck and roll his hips against Dan.

"Phil! You're going to crush me and our baby!"

_Our baby._

Phil nearly growls at the sound of that, and picks a now smiling Dan up bridal style, carrying him to his bedroom to properly celebrate.

.

It's an hour later, and they're cuddling into bed naked together with Dan completely at ease for the first time in a while. Despite his greater height, Dan has managed to tuck himself into Phil's side with his head on Phil's shoulder and a hand on his chest. Phil can't seem to stop touching Dan's belly, fingers now currently tracing absentmindedly under his navel. The night is cool, dark, and clear. The drillers have finally stopped for the night, and the quiet sounds of London suburbs are lulling them into sleep.

"Dan, I've been thinking...."

"I know what you're thinking, and  _absolutely not_. Under no circumstances will I let you name our baby Susan. _NO, PHIL_."

Phil just laughs and tightens his grip around Dan's shoulder before planting a soft kiss in Dan's hair.

_Good night, my loves._

_I love you both so much._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please leave comments! They feed this hungry little writer's soul. Also, they give me motivation to keep going! Promise to update faster!


	5. Olive, Part I

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lots of crying and kissing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here I am, dragging my sorry ass back from who knows where. I'm the actual worst, I know. Anyway, hope you enjoy~  
> Please leave a comment! They mean so much to me, and they pressure me into writing more quickly!  
> Also, please leave comments about things you want to see in the story!

It’s morning.

Dan awakens so gently, eyes still heavy with sleep and mind still far away in dreamland. It’s warm and soft and the sun is illuminating his room and  _oh, that is definitely a hand in the waistband of his sleep pants._

He forces his eyes open and sees Phil snuggled in his neck and looking up at him with those damned blue eyes.

_“Good morning, mummy.”_

Dan groans and feebly tries to roll away. He does not need this in the morning.

“How long have you been watching me sleep, you creepo?”

Phil just laughs as he gently caresses the bottom curve of Dan’s stomach.

“Is that a banana in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?”

Giggling, Phil rolls his hips against Dan’s leg again before stretching up to smother Dan’s face in kisses.

“Get up!” –  _kiss_  – “Get dressed!” –  _kiss_  – “Eat breakfast!” –  _kiss_  - “We’re going to see our baby today!”

He leaps out of bed, turns to flash Dan a cheeky grin before rushing back to the bedside to press a loud smacking kiss sound to Dan’s belly and then dashing out of the room.

A child. Dan has agreed to marry an absolute child.

Dan turns to lay on his back and stare at the ceiling for a bit.

"Your daddy is so silly, baby. What are we going to do?"

Apparently, the answer is get out of bed right now and go eat breakfast immediately as his stomach lets out a loud growl.

Dan throws on a hoodie and stumbles into the kitchen to find Phil wearing his manly apron, making toast and cutting fruit. He sneaks up behind to before quietly slipping his arms around Phil's waist and resting his chin on Phil's shoulder.

"Feed us, Daddy. We're hungry."

Dan put on his best whiny sugarbaby voice as Phil's spine stiffened, and Dan smirks to himself.

Smiling, Phil turns to press a kiss to Dan's temple.

"Give me a second, baby. Go wait for me on the couch, yeah? I've put a mug of tea for you on the table."

Dan shivers at Phil's deep voice and squeaks slightly as Phil playfully pinches his butt cheek when he leaves.

They manage to finish breakfast with only a little bit of spilled coffee on Phil's part and a protesting shriek from Dan at Phil's sticky kisses in his hair which led to the two of them stumbling them off to the bathroom together for a steamy shower.  

.

Knees side by side, Dan lays his head on Phil's shoulder in the relative calm of the mid-morning London train ride. Phil's arm finds its familiar place around Dan's shoulder and his other hand rests softly on the hem of Dan's shirt. Dan swats him away, not wanting to attract unwanted attention.

At their stop, they walk off together, hand in gentle hand, with Phil standing protectively slightly in front of him to ward off any overzealous angry businessmen rushing about. 

Once at the doctor's office, Dan takes a seat in the waiting room while Phil goes to register.

It’s in a quieter part of London, a second story office with a flower shop downstairs and a bakery next to that. The plush sofas, the soft lighting, and the landscape pictures on the walls make it feel warm and safe. 2 pregnant women sit nearby, quietly reading as they wait their turn, and another couple are cuddled into one of the loveseats, the husband’s arm around his slim wife’s shoulders. She gives Dan a small smile when he glances at her and her huge belly.

_“Holy crap, that’s going to be me.”_

He glances down at his non-existent baby bump and takes a deep shaky breath.

This is it. This is real. He’s going to go in there and a real medical professional is going to tell him that he is really actually pregnant with Phil's baby inside of him and that he's going to have to grow it in his belly and push it out of his body and raise it and take care of it forever and when did he sign up for this because he is still just a scared kid and he doesn't actually know anything and oh gosh this was a very very bad idea and- 

His rampaging thoughts are interrupted by Phil plopping down in the seat next to him.

"You're tapping less than you usually would be. Is everything okay?" Phil jokes, but as soon as he sees just how still and distant Dan is being as he stares at the ground, he gently takes Dan's hand and brings it to his lips. Dan looks at him and Phil can see his dark under eye circles, the worried wrinkle in his forehead, the uncertainty in his expression, the exhaustion, the fear.

Phil gets up to tell the receptionist at the front desk that they'll be back soon before he beckons for Dan to stand, a protective arm around his waist, and leads him out of the office into the hallway. 

As soon as the door closed behind them, Dan lets out a choked dry sob and threw himself into Phil’s arms and hid his face in Phil’s shoulder junction. Immediately Phil’s arms were around him, one hand caressing his hair and the other gently rubbing up and down Dan’s spine, trying to calm the shuddering boy against his chest.

“I can’t do this, Phil.”

Dan’s small voice was almost too quiet to hear against the fabric of Phil’s coat. Phil presses his lips firmly against Dan’s temple, feeling Dan’s fist clench harder around the front of his shirt.

“I can’t go in there. Going in there makes it all real. The doctor is going to tell me that there’s a baby inside of me and I feel like total shit because I know you’re so excited and so ready to be a dad, but all I can feel is tired and hungry and grouchy and fat and my gosh, _I’m so fucking terrified, Phil._ ”

At this point, Dan’s voice is only a hoarse whisper and his eyelashes are darkened with tears as he hiccups and struggles to regain steady breathing. Phil thumbs away the starry trails that stain Dan’s cheeks as tenderly as he can.

“Tell me what you’re afraid of, darling.”

Dan’s eyes flash and Phil can barely hear Dan’s panicked whisper.

_“What if I’m not a good parent?”_

Something in Phil’s heart crumbles and breaks.

“Oh, honey, is that what this is all about?”

A quiet sniff serves as Dan’s reply, and Phil presses another kiss to the corner of his mouth before taking a step back, drawing one hand to Dan’s jaw and the other to rest gently at Dan’s waist. He keeps his voice low and soft as he softly thumbs his belly.

“Dan, listen to me. We are going to go back inside and the doctor is going to show us our baby, and I promise when you see them, you will not be scared any more. And you know why? It’s because you’re going to fall so in love with them and your heart is going to feel so full that there’s not going to be room for any fear.”

Dan glances up to meet Phil’s determined gaze.

“Do you think I'm not scared? I'm so scared, too. Scared for your health, scared for how everyone is going to react, scared that I'm not going to be a good dad. But then I see you next to me, and I'm not scared any more. Remember my promise to you? I’m never going to let you feel alone, and I’m going to be with you always and take care of you and this baby, and we’re going to work so hard together to make this the best life we could have.”

At this point, Dan’s tears are threatening to well up again, and his gaze falls back down as he can only wordlessly nod and try not to burst.

This time, Phil’s hand on his jaw pulls Dan in for a kiss on the lips, and Dan just lets himself melt into it, feeling the warmth and intensity and love pouring out. They gently break away, Dan a bit breathless as he rests his forehead against Phil’s. After another quick peck, Phil softly takes Dan’s hand and leads him back into the doctor’s office. Phil’s right arm protectively pulls Dan into himself as they sit once again on the sofa, and he interlaces their fingers together, lightly stroking Dan’s engagement ring. Dan takes another deep breath, wipes his eyes one last time, and turns to hide his face in Phil’s neck with his eyes closed.

They remain in this position, feeling each breath and each heartbeat together. The husband of the other couple nods knowingly at Phil when he and his wife walk past as the nurse calls them in for their appointment. His nod seemed to convey, "Yep, I've been there, buddy. It is so much hard work and things are only going to get more difficult, but it's all going to be worth it in the end."

.

"Lester!"

A small older nurse with curled brown hair stands at the door holding a clip board.

Phil turns to look down towards Dan's face still tucked into his neck and presses a soft kiss into his hair.

"Come on, Mrs. Lester, let's go see our baby."

Dan sniffs quietly, rubs his eyes for any lingering tears, and takes one more deep shuddering breath.

Phil stands and leads Dan up, gently interlacing their fingers and pulling him close as they follow the nurse into the back rooms.

"First baby?"

The nurse asks sweetly at Dan as he nods with a small nervous smile. 

"You're going to do just fine, darling!"

She gives him a motherly pat on the arm before asking him to step on the scale.

Dan winces at the number of his weight, but doesn't have time to linger on the thought before he is shuffled off with Phil into one of the examination rooms. Carol, as he sees on her nametag, hands him a hospital gown and a cup for a urine sample.

Dan roughly pushes Phil out of the room and locks the door behind him, emerging after a few minutes having changed into the gown and holding the filled sample cup away from him with a grimace.

Carol returns with a tray and takes the cup from Dan. 

"Hop up onto the examination chair for me, love, and stretch out your arm on the arm rest. We'll just need to take a sample for a blood test."

Dan shoots a terrified look at Phil, and Carol laughs kind-heartedly.

"And of course, you can hold his hand, dear."

Dan knows he should feel embarrassed by how quickly he snatches up Phil's hand and how white his knuckles are turning as he grips Phil or how he's staring determinedly at the print on Phil's shirt, away from the needle stabbing into his arm...

"And all done! See, now that wasn't so bad, now, was it, love?"

Dan sniffs and allows himself a small huff of relief as Carol quickly adheres a bandage over the area and exits the room. Phil reassuringly rubs his shoulder and kisses his temple with Dan grouchily turning away. They sit in content silence for a while longer, fingers still interlaced as they wait.

After a while, a knock is heard on the other side of the door, and a pretty young doctor with long black braids enters the room. Dan's spine stiffens, and he feels himself start to hyperventilate again. 

"Hi, I'm Dr. Goodwin, and I will be your doctor throughout this pregnancy. Daniel and Phillip Lester, I presume?"

Phil, not bothering to correct her, shakes her small, perfectly manicured hand and gives her his warmest smile.

"Dan and Phil, please." 

Dan only manages to squeeze out one very tight-lipped smile and makes no effort greet her in any other way as he is trying so hard to stop his hands from trembling.

"Now, as we're waiting for the results of your urine and blood tests, I'm going to be going over some of basic health questions and your family's health history to make sure your pregnancy goes as smoothly as possible."

Phil nods enthusiastically, answering each of the questions Dr. Goodwin asks him about age, weight, family disease history, diet, exercise, sexual activity. At this point, Dan is completely zoned out, staring at the tiled pattern on the floor as he tries to keep his breathing and his heart rate normal. Did his heart always pound so loudly in his ears?

After about 30 minutes, Carol enters the room with a folder in hand for Dr. Goodwin. After a quick flip through the papers inside, she turns with a huge smile towards Dan whose attention had swiftly snapped up to wait for her reaction. 

"Congratulations! You are officially confirmed as pregnant!"

Dan can only nod. Of course he is. Why else would he be here?

 She asks a few more questions before clicking her pen and closing the file.

"Now, who's ready to see the baby?"

An ultrasound technician rolls the machine in. 

Phil is literally bouncing up and down in his seat.

Dan grips the armrest because he is about 2 seconds from bolting out the door.

Dr. Goodwin gently lifts and folds up Dan's shirt over his chest. She flips on the machine, which begins to whir and beep and whoosh.

A nurse spreads the gel over his belly, and Dan hisses with the unexpected cold.

Dr. Goodwin turns to face Dan and Phil, wand in hand.

"Let's see what we've got in here..."

Phil brings his face so close to the monitor that Dan wants to shove him.

Dr. Goodwin places the wand on Dan's belly and slowly begins to scan.

All eyes are glued to the screen which still shows nothing but a black shadowy image.

Dr. Goodwin stares intensely, moving the stick carefully around, looking for...

"Aha!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, cliffhanger, wow~ 
> 
> Guys, please leave comments about stuff you want to see in the story! It's going to start picking up from here (maybe including some sexysexy time in the next chapter if you know what I mean...)
> 
> It really means so much to me that you guys read my story and that you take the time to write things to me!


	6. Olive, Part II

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I literally have no excuse for posting so late.  
> On the bright side, I have since been on 2 dates. 
> 
> ~
> 
> First attempt at smut. Dan is still a crybaby and Phil is a kinky little shit.

Dan can’t hear anything.

Everything around him seems to be moving in slow motion and he can’t even seem to feel his own body aside from his hammering heart as his eyes are completely focused on the small monitor.

Amidst the humming of the machine and the quiet chatter of the hospital, in the black moving shadows of the screen, a small white blob appears.

_His baby._

_Phil’s baby._

Life inside him right now, physical evidence of their love and the tiny being it created.

It is not until he feels tears dripping off his face that he notices that he is crying. He gasps and quickly draws his free hand up to wipe them away, the other hand tightly clenching Phil's.

He looks up to see Phil frozen with his hand over his mouth, a joyous expression plastered all over his face. Phil manages to tear his gaze away to meet Dan's and the look exchanged between them, a look of love, of _look what we did_ , of  _can you believe that_ , of  _ohmygosh that's our baby_ , was all it took before Dan bursts out sobbing.

Phil immediately firmly presses his lips against Dan's temple and cheek over and over, smiling so hard and so big his face hurts. 

“There they are!” cried Dr. Goodwin.

She squints at the screen and takes down some figures.

“Judging by your baby’s growth measurements and your health record, you’re about 9 weeks along, which would have put the date of conception at around the second week of April.”

Phil lets out a laugh, shaking his head as he whispers excitedly to Dan, “Our baby was made in Japan!”

This only makes Dan cry harder as this means the baby was conceived after their engagement, their biggest promise of commitment to each other, out of the overflowing love they shared.

Dr. Goodwin points out the baby's head and limbs, Phil nodding enthusiastically at each with a crazed smile. Dan can barely see through his tears, both hands clutching Phil's sleeve as he lays his head against Phil's arm, now sniffling quietly.

Dan can't process a word Dr. Goodwin is saying. His entire brain is still going off in little explosions of  _that's a baby.  I have a baby inside me.  I have Phil's baby inside me.  Phil and I made a baby and it's inside me right now._

The doctor takes several pictures of their baby at different angles, explaining to an exhilarated Phil and a dumbstruck Dan which was each leg and that their baby was currently about the size of an olive and was laying on their side.

Dan's mindspace is shattered when the technician wipes the gel off his belly and clicks the screen off. He drags one heavy hand to pull his shirt back down. He wishes he could have seen more.

Carol quickly scurries out of the room to get copies of their ultrasounds as Dr. Goodwin goes through the checklist of what not to eat, what not to do, what vitamins to take, that sex is still okay, when the upcoming appointments will be.

Phil takes in every little detail, memorizing every little detail of how to take care of Dan during his pregnancy. He eagerly takes all the pamphlets and thanks Dr. Goodwin over and over again as she gets up to leave.

She firmly shakes Phil's hand before bending down slightly to place a gentle hand on Dan's knee, trying to meet his watery gaze.

"You're going to do so great! You are so strong and your baby is going to be so lucky to have you and your husband as their parents! Trust me on this one; you can do it!"

Dan can't answer other than a nod and a tiny tightening of his lips that was supposed to resemble a smile. Dr. Goodwin pats his knee reassuringly once more with a smile before sweeping out of the room, off to help begin another family. 

Dan shakily pulls himself up to a sitting position with a shuddering deep breath, drawing his arms across his belly, staring blankly at the floor. Phil kneels in between his legs, looking up and reaching his hand out to thumb away any remaining sparkling teardrops off Dan's face.

"Talk to me, love."

Dan can't bear just how soft and gentle and loving Phil's deep voice is right now.

"Holy shit."

Phil could barely hear his whisper.

" _Holy shit, Phil._ "

Dan's gaze now meets Phil's, a burning intensity in his brown eyes. Panic? 

"Phil. There is a baby inside me."

Phil laughs, a hand gently stroking Dan's knee. "Perceptive, Dan."

"PHIL. THERE IS A BABY INSIDE ME."

Dan's voice cracks as he whisper-screams. His eyes start to tear up again, and he hides his face in his hands, shoulders shaking. Phil quickly stands and gathers him in a warm embrace, with Dan reaching out to clutch his shirt and hide his face in the junction of Phil's neck.

 "I’ve got a baby growing inside me! You and I made a baby together and oh my god, Phil, we’re going to be a family now!”

Dan is ugly sobbing again, and he doesn’t care that passing nurses keep peering into their room with concern at his wailing.

Phil just holds him, one hand stroking up and down his back, the other carding gently through his hair.

_“You always were my family.”_

.

Phil is gentle, so gentle. He leads a teary Dan by the waist out of the doctor’s office after making their next appointment with Carol who pats Dan on the cheek.

He hails a taxi, and opens the door for Dan before ushering him inside.

Phil cannot keep his hands to himself. Dan lays one soft hand over his belly and Phil cannot help but lay his own over Dan’s, stroking his engagement ring, that little black band and the small bump that is holding the promises of their future.

He throws his other arm over Dan, a signal for him to lay his head on Phil’s shoulder. Phil keeps pressing kisses into his hair and on his temple, whispering over and over “Thank you, thank you, thank you. I love you so much, I love you so much, baby.”

Dan preens at the affection and places his lips on Phil’s neck and snuggles as close to Phil as the seat will allow.

By the time they get home, Dan is red-faced and whimpering for attention while Phil’s pants are growing tighter. Phil quickly hands a 20 pound note to the driver, before pulling Dan out of the car and into their building. Dan struggles to get the key out of his pocket as Phil crowds his space behind him, hands roaming and touching.

When the door finally opens, they stumble in the door and Dan finds himself pressed against the wall as Phil’s eager hands are already slipping under his jacket to push it off his shoulders. Their lips meet roughly, Phil’s hand entangled in Dan’s hair as they also struggle to kick off their shoes. Dan moans as Phil's hips roll against his crotch, fingers eagerly trying to undo the buttons on Phil's shirt. Phil's teeth drag across Dan's bottom lip as he pulls away and taking Dan by the shoulders, both of them breathing hard.

 "Stop for a second, Dan."

Dan lets out a high-pitched whine as he tries to invade Phil's space once again.

" _But Daddy, I need you..._ " he whispers against Phil's neck.

Something in Phil's persona snaps. He blue eyes seem to get darker, his voice huskier and deeper, sending an exhilarating chill up Dan's spine.

"Oh, so that's how you want to play now, baby?"

Dan is practically begging Phil to get his hands on him.

"Go upstairs and wait for me in my room. Get yourself ready for me. Got that, sweetheart?"

Dan nods his head violently, desperation gleaming in his eyes. 

"Good boy."

Phil kisses him roughly once more before dragging his lips down to bite at his neck.

Dan can barely suppress a moan as Phil pushes him gently away after giving him a hard slap on the ass.

He all but runs up the stairs, throwing himself on Phil's bed and hastily undressing, throwing his clothes off to the ground. He leaves his underwear on, knowing just how Phil wants to take him.

After a few minutes, Phil appears in the doorway.

A feral instinct rips through him as he sees a mostly bare Dan laying on his sheets, eyes closed in pleasure and want, skin flushed, one hand palming his cock through the thin fabric of his tight black briefs as his hips rock up. His eyes flutter open at the sound of Phil's footsteps.

" _Please, Phil..._ "

"Hands off, darling. You know the rules." 

Reluctantly, Dan takes his hand away from his clothed bulge, sitting up and crawling to the edge of the bed, eyes now large and pleading.

Phil slowly saunters up to him, an animalistic aura radiating off him. He takes Dan by the back of the neck and slowly draws near.

He pauses 2 inches away, and Dan can feel his hot breath on his face. Their eyes meet, Phil's sparkling dangerously as Dan tries to communicate silently just how much he needs Phil to touch him more. Phil's flashes a smug grin before finally,  _finally_  meeting Dan's lips in a soft, gentle, relentless kiss. He slips his tongue into Dan's mouth, stealing his breath as he draws his hands up to softly push Dan's shoulders back onto the bed.

Dan lays here, spread out for his love. Agonizingly slowly, Phil leans over him, kissing up his chest, over his collarbone, up to his neck. Dan lets out a shameless moan when Phil begins to nibble on his neck. 

" _Is this okay, sweetheart? Are you comfortable? Does the baby feel okay? Are you sure you want to play like this? Do you remember our special word? We can stop any time you want._ " Even now, when Dan can feel Phil's dick heavy against his belly, Phil is so infuriatingly gentle as he whispers tenderly into Dan's ear.

Dan responds with quick kisses, nodding furiously, his hands impatiently reaching down to roughly unbutton Phil's jeans and push them down his thighs.

Once he got Dan's permission, Phil's persona immediately changed.

" _Look at you, so desperate for my cock. Already knocked up and still such a slut._ "

Dan squeaked from those words, the feeling going straight to his dick, shivering at Phil's hot breath as he growls against Dan's ear. 

" _Knees apart, baby, and don't you dare come without my permission_."

Phil licks at Dan's pulse point on his neck, gently toying at it with his teeth before latching on and sucking hard. Dan nearly comes right there, hips thrusting up violently, his dick already dripping obscenely through his briefs, aching for friction.

Phil lets out a deep chuckle as he breaks away briefly to step out of his jeans and pull his shirt off over his head before sliding his huge hands down Dan's sides and into the waistband of his briefs to give his asscheeks a good firm grip before sliding them off. His fingers squeeze roughly before slowly drawing back down toward Dan's crack.

Dan breathes in sharply as Phil's dry fingers just barely trace his hole, circling his rim in a tantalizing tease. He tries to push his hips back towards Phil, wanting him to touch more, but Phil quickly withdrew his hands out of his pants. Instead, he begins to palm himself, grabbing his dick through his own underwear and coaxing it to full hardness.

Dan swallows as he notices Phil's obscene bulge. It's been so many years and Phil still makes him feel like a young nervous teenager. Seeing Dan stare, Phil slowly slides his hands into his waistband and pulls his dick out to hang before sliding his underwear to the ground.

Dan licks his lips and cannot help but feel his mouth water a little bit. He has had Phil so many times, and yet, each time, he is always amazed how beautiful and enormous his cock is. He looks up into Phil's eyes with lips parted and tongue slightly extended, a begging expression that required no words. Phil's demeanor breaks a little as he presses a kiss to Dan's lips.

" _Sorry, hon. Baby eats everything you swallow, so it's a no for now._ " His deep gentle whisper makes Dan whine as he kisses back with fervor. 

Phil smiles and back away, reaching over to the nightstand for their half-empty bottle of lube, and  slowly, so so slowly, Phil dips one lubed finger into Dan's hole, holding his hips down firmly to prevent Dan from rutting upwards. He gasps and clutches at Phil's arm involuntarily.

Smiling with a glint in his eye, Phil plunges a second finger in and Dan's back arches off the bed as his prostate is hit for the first time. Dan almost screams with frustration at how agonizing the teasing is. 

Dan can already feel the tears prickling at his eyes. He still remembers their first time when he was still a teenager and how Phil had freaked out when Dan started crying, pulling out of him and apologizing over and over until Dan explained that he just cries during sex as an emotional relief.  

He tries to shift his hips to get some friction, but Phil holds him down, still just gently caressing his velvety walls as Dan's rim flutters around his fingers. He purposely goes slowly and carefully, occasionally prodding Dan's prostate and making him squeak.

"Please, Phil, I'm ready, I'm so ready, I can take it, please just fuck me already."

 Phil silences him with another firm kiss, pulling out his fingers and slicking his cock up. He breaks the kiss to look Dan in the eyes, and Dan could feel his heart skip a beat, even after all this time.

Dan chokes back a sob as he feels Phil's blunt tip at his entrance. 

" _I love you so much, baby._ " And Phil suddenly slams his cock into Dan without warning as he captures Dan's lips again.

Dan's scream is muted as he lets Phil's tongue into his mouth, tears now flowing freely at the glorious stretch and burn he felt.

Phil lets out a deep guttural moan as Dan's slick walls seem to suck him in and he almost comes right there from the delicious pressure.

" _Oh, you feel so good, so tight for me. Just taking my cock, like you were made for it._ "

He pulls out halfway slowly before slamming back into Dan's heat, still whispering filthy things at Dan as he rocks his hips in and out slowly. 

Dan can only groan sinfully in response, raking his nails down Phil’s back as he buries his face into Phil’s neck.

" _Don't hide your pretty face from me, darling.”_

Dan throws his head back onto the pillow, exposing his neck now blooming with fresh hickeys. Smiling, Phil adds another gentle kiss mark to Dan’s delicate collarbone as his thrusts grow progressively stronger.

" _Hands and knees for me now._

Dan scrambles to flip himself over and present his round full ass to Phil, an open invitation to do whatever he wants. Phil can't help but groan at how desperate, how willing, how obedient Dan gets in his headspace.

He traces a finger lightly against Dan’s puckered rim and he can hear Dan whimper with his face pressed into his pillow. He reaches around to tug on Dan’s cock once, twice before suddenly spanking his ass cheek with a resounding smack.

Dan wails into the pillow, his hips thrusting into Phil’s hand as a blob of pre-cum drips out of his tip. Phil continues to stroke him mercilessly, Dan’s dick now fully erect and dark as Phil’s hand slides up and down his shaft.

His movement of Dan’s cock not stopping, he positions his own dick at Dan’s once and thrusts in time with his hand jerking off. At this point, Dan screams with each thrust, his prostate and his dick overstimulated.

With one hand buried in Dan’s hair, Phil pulls Dan up to a sitting position in his lap with a moan, now fully seated on Phil's cock. Dan’s pliant body is completely loose as he lets his head fall back against Phil’s shoulder, lost in his needy pleasure at Phil’s hand on his cock. He attempts to sloppily kiss Phil’s neck, moaning shamelessly and breathing hard as he swivels his hips.

" _You like that, baby? You’re so loud, the neighbors are gonna call the police. Come on, let me hear how good I'm making you feel._ "

Dan lets out a shriek as Phil reaches to pinch his ultra-sensitive nipples.

“Yellow! Yellowyellowyellow!”

Phil immediately stops moving, hands off and frozen as Dan takes a couple of deep shuddering breaths against his chest.

“You okay, baby? I’m so sorry. Let’s take it easy on the nipples. Thank you for letting me know.”

Dan nods as he regains his composure, tears streaking his face afresh as he crawls out of Phil’s lap back onto the bed.

“Let’s lay back down again, okay? Everything still good? Baby still feel good? Can I continue?”

Phil punctuates each sentence with a kiss up Dan’s arm until he reaches his lips to capture them once more as he gently folds Dan’s legs over his shoulders and places his hands on either side of Dan’s belly. Slowly, he enters Dan again with a low groan, hips pistoning in and out harder and faster with each movement as he grips Dan by the waist.

The headboard steadily knocks up against the wall again and again as Phil's powerful thrusts into Dan shift the entire bed. Phil's enormous cock punches his prostate every time, and Dan thinks he might pass out.   

" _Gonna fuck you so hard, put another baby in you._ " Phil is just babbling nonsense at this point, but Dan nods desperately as he stares into his eyes.

" _You'd love that, wouldn't you? Me, filling you up again, fucking another child into you. Gonna give you twins, baby._ "  There's nothing Dan wants more.

_"You look so gorgeous like this. You're going to look so gorgeous, all round and glowing with my baby in you. And everyone's gonna know. The whole world is going to know that I fucked you like this, that this baby is mine, that you're mine."_

 Dan lets out a choking sob, eyelashes sparkling with the tears streaming down his face as he can't do anything but speechlessly nod and push his hips up to meet Phil's  thrusts. 

_"Who do you belong to?_

"You, Phil!"

Dan cries out as Phil smacks him hard with his palm every several thrusts, a hot stinging sensation as his ass begins to bloom pink. 

_"Say it, who do you belong to?"_

"You! I belong to you, Daddy!"

Phil's hips slam in Dan repeatedly, one hand cradling Dan's jaw as he roughly shoves his tongue into Dan's mouth to steal a kiss, the other entangled in his hair.

Dan gasps, "Phil! Phil, please, I'm going to come, please let me come!"

Phil leans over to his ear and whispers:

" _Cum for me, baby._ "

Dan lets out a hoarse cry as he cums untouched, shooting white all over his belly as his back arches off the bed. By now, he's sobbing breathlessly again, locking his trembling legs around Phil's back as he continues to rock violently up and down Phil's cock. 

“ _Phil! Please, please come on my belly!_ ”

 After several hard thrusts, Phil pulls out of Dan and aggressive jerks off until he cums with a shout, a huge load of cum exploding out of his dick to land on Dan's belly, chest, and collarbones. 

Dan is a vision to see, lying on his back, skin glowing and pink, hair curling at the ends, eyes glassy and unfocused, legs apart all fucked out with cum splattered sinfully everywhere.

Eyes still locked on Dan's, Phil slowly draws up to lick a bead of cum off Dan's collarbone, and Dan can't help but let out a weak moan at just how fucking hot Phil is.

Phil immediately swooped down to capture his lips in a long, sweet kiss, brushing away any lingering tears off his face. Dan can still taste Phil on his lips and he whines as Phil pulls away, chasing for one more kiss.

He always gets so clingy after sex, now pulling Phil's arms around him and intertwining their legs as he strokes Phil's hair and burrows against Phil's neck.

They lay like that for several minutes, a messy tangle of limbs and love, chests rising and falling together in this perfect moment that belongs only to them.

Quieting Dan's squeak of protest with another kiss, Phil gets up to retrieve a towel from the bathroom to clean Dan off.

After gently wiping his chest, Phil lays back down next to him, one gentle hand on Dan's belly, fingers resting gently where their child is growing. Dan reaches over to the nightstand to retrieve a copy of the ultrasound from that morning, seeing it with clear eyes for the first time. He snuggles deeper into Phil's chest as he stares at the piece of paper, Phil's other arm enveloping around him as he presses warm tender kisses in Dan's hair and all over his cheeks again and again.

Yes, they're going to have to break it to the world soon. Yes, more difficult days lie ahead. But right now, nothing else matters but the beautiful boy in his arms and their little secret hidden between them.

_Everything is going to be perfect._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guys i've literally had half of this written for months and I couldn't finish it. I promise on my entire penny collection that the next updates will come out sooner. I already have the next chapter planned out.
> 
> Please comment below what you think!  
> THANKS FOR READING.
> 
> (sidenote: D&P are not coming to my town for TATINOF (AND I LIVE IN ONE OF THE BIGGEST CITIES IN MY STATE) so I have to drive 4 hours to get to the next closest one...)


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